Anger Management
Anger
First let me assure you that anger is a normal part of life, we all experience anger in some form in our lives, some experience more often than others, people react to anger in many different ways …………………… Don’t feel that you should never get angry in fact it’s okay to get angry.
There are times when it is not okay ……………
it’s not okay to let your anger get out of control and destroy your life or the lives of those around you, when your outbursts of anger
create fear in others, or are the recipients of physical, emotional or mental abuse.Have you allowed your anger to fester over many years that it has got to the point that you think about it all the time, or every time you
have a family get together it blows out of proportion and again all your family dread you being there?It’s not okay to carry that anger with you for years and years allowing it to fester to the point where the anger doesn’t allow you to move forward,
and affects your colleagues at work, your family, friends or neighbours. If you allow your anger get out of control and dominate your life it will destroy your relationships, your work experience and the overall quality of your life.
Common Problems
– arising from Anger and Temper issues can involve
- Fear
- Damaged Relationships,
- Estranged from Children/Parents
- Legal and Court involvement,
- Stress
- Depression
- Heart Disease
- Alcohol and Substance use,
- Guilt,
- Anxiety and
- other emotional problems.
Your Anger can be caused by a number of factors.
- Road Rage is a very common cause of anger these days where everyone is in a hurry to get where they are going,
– Someone cutting you off while driving can set you off.
Someone not indicating when changing lanes, driving too slow, trucks hogging the freeway lanes etc - You continuously replay in your mind what happened 1,2, or 10 years ago and still hold on to the anger you felt back then
– Let me ask you – is it happening in your life now? Here right now? - So why are you choosing to continually relive something that happened years ago?
- Do you get angry with yourself for not being prepared for your future?
- Do you continually think about what someone said to you in the past?
- Do you continually fear what happened in the past will happen to you again –
– and blame what happened back then as the reason you are not experiencing the success you want now? - How often has someone said something that you considered to be the wrong thing and it has set you off.
- Have you been called ‘stupid’ or another name and it took you back to the what your Father, Mother, sibling, teacher used to call you
and you react in such a way that you create another situation.
Secondary physiological problems
can arise such as
- Stress Rashes,
- High Blood Pressure
- Skin Disorders
- Heart Disease
- Panic Attackes
- Phobias
- and other stress induced disorders.
Whether you are the type of person who has a typical aggressive personality or has an extreme temper issue,
using a combination of practical techniques, NLP and self hypnosis, anger and temper can rapidly be brought
under control within where a practical and comfortable level of relaxation is attained.
Anger Is Really About YOU Not Having Your Expectations Met
If you’re angry at yourself is it not because you haven’t met your own expectations.
or if you take a closer look you’ll most likely realize that you’re really angry because someone else did not meet up to your expectations.
If you’re angry at your parents for not teaching you better or for not treating you properly
Is it not because you expected at the time that they could have treated you better or taught you better,
or now as you have grown and experiencing things differently, you now expect them to have treated you better or taught you better.
Is it not true that they didn’t live up to your expectations.
Do you constantly tell others what you expect from them, then change your mind without them knowing
then get angry because they were not aware that you had changed your mind about what you expected?
When you are driving on the road and get angry at another driver that has cut in front of you, is it not because you expected
some courtesy from him or her and they didn’t live up to that expectation.
Has there been times when you expected you would do well at something and you didn’t
were you not angry at yourself for not doing well enough, or not doing something properly?
Did you get angry because you expected yourself to do better than you did?.
Your children did not become the professional you were, and you became disappointed and got angry with them
for not following your dreams that you had for them, was it not because your expectations were not met?
How often are your expectations not met and you got angry, felt disappointed and allowed yourself to over react
just because your expectations were not met.
Not everybody is going to meet your expectations
especially when they’re not even aware of what those expectations of yours are.
Anger is such a waste of your energy.
It is your choice to step into the victim mode and blame situations or everyone else for what has happened,
rant and rave about how they should have known better, let me ask you …….
How is that behaviour working for you?
How has that repetitive ranting behaviour of yours been getting you the results you want?
I am guessing that you have actually felt so much worse after your ranting, raving, cursing and anger outbursts……………
you also have most likely suffered more stress, felt disempowered. become less focused and productive,
experienced headaches, migraines and got yourself into a real ole emotional state which affected your family, friends and colleagues
…………………… can you recall a time that this happened in your life?
So What Do You Do Now?
- Change your expectations.
- Discover How you can learn to acknowledge and accept others differences
- Engage in some personal development to learn anger management skills
- Appreciate other people right to think differently
- Choose to concentrate on the things YOU CAN CHANGE
- Stay focussed on what empowers you
- Decide on a clear path forward
- Take action in achieving
- Motivate those around you with encouragement
- be proud of those around you and their achievements
- Look for the Good – overlook the not so good (According to you)
- Setting your expectations too high
- Bringing work problems home with you
- Taking Home problems to work with you
- visiting difficult relations
- Looking for a fight
- being an energy zapper
- Dealing with other peoples aggression
- Hangin on to friends who are energy zappers – Do a Friend Audit yearly.
- Being Unfaithful in your relationship – Karma happens – it is your guilt that makes you angry.
- Begrudging the good fortunes of others
- impulsivity and explosive unpredictability — making others uncomfortable
- Cruel or nasty
- quarrelsome
After many years of experiencing anger in my life, I chose to do a complete audit of all of the people in my life who were continuously critical,
jealous of my success, energy zappers, continuously blaming me for their imperfections, and Instead, I choose to concentrate on the things
I CAN change and stay focused on my own personal power, taking responsibility for changing the things I can to fully enjoy my life every day.
There’s no use in you looking back, you cannot change what has happened yesterday, last week, last month, last year or 10 years ago
but you are in control of how you want your life to be today,k tomorrow, next week or next year.
Create the life you want with the people you want to spend it with and always acknowledge those that have supported in you being where you are in life today.
Start taking MASSIVE Action to achieve what you want NOW.
Blessed Be He Who Has No Expectations
For They Shall never Be Disappointed